Last of the Tulips

Mmmm...breakfast. While enjoying my breakfast this morning, I realized that I was sipping the last of the Tulip Festival Blend that I bought from the Skagit Valley's Fidalgo Bay Coffee Roasters. 

If you recall a few posts back this was the place where I went with my Aunties Arnie and Jan to enjoy yummy clam chowder and an enormous cinnamon bun. This is possibly some of the best drip coffee I've enjoyed and it makes me sad that it is at an end, like the tale of my trip to Seattle in March.

We enjoyed our last morning nicely and easily. It had been a great, whirlwind trip, so it was lovely to sip our coffees and watch the rain drip from the flora and fauna of their yard. The furred and feathered ones were already fed, but we had to take poor Mocha-Moch to the vet. She had a bladder infection. As we awaited our appointment, that was when Arnie and I fed the chickens, the crows, the squirrels, and Ellie Mae, the cat living on the heating pad in her retirement home under Gladys, their day traveler. 

We packed up my things and loaded up the RAV, bound to take Mocha to the vet at the bottom of their hill. It was tough to leave poor Mocha at the vet for observation. I had become quite fond of that sweet ball of fluff and love. She had slept on my luggage all morning and her brother CJ spent the night beside me on my sleeping bag (I was freezing - had numerous blankie and a sleeping bag to keep me warm.) 

Once Mocha was at the vet, we were off to Seattle. We planned our adventures around getting me to SEA/TAC - the airport - on time. I purposefully booked an afternoon flight so that we could spend as much time playing during the day as possible. Our first stop was to Jan and Arnie's church so that we could look at the beautiful photos of my aunt's that were on display. She is a nature and bird photographer and boy oh boy are her photos amazing! See for yourself here at her website.

From there we went to the University of Washington's Kayak rental facility to enjoy Mexican food overlooking one of the many waterways of Seattle. I have to admit, we ate very good Mexican food on this trip. After my YEARS of hunting for Mexican food that resembled what I knew from home in NYC, I was delightfully surprised by the Mexican yummies we enjoyed in the North West. The view from the little restaurant was superb. We got to look out on houseboats and kayaks being prepared for the spring season. 

From there we went to the Center of Wooden Boats where I was able to nerd-out on the many different vessels they had on display. (Are you noticing a theme of boats? There's a good chance that I like them, but I'll never tell! Unless you've been reading this blog for a while and then you may already know the answer to that.)

Moving on.

We stood in sight of the Space Needle, but our goal for the day was to visit another well known Seattle Institution; no, nothing to do with Bill Gates, Pike's Peak, Costco, or Starbucks (although that eventually happened). Instead, we went underground. That's right, under the very streets. 

The Old Down Town Seattle

There was ONE recommendation my friends from back home had for me on my journey to Seattle and it was to go do the underground tour. I'm SO glad I took their advice. I'm a history Nerdette and love to hear a good story, so this was the perfect adventure. I'm not going to do a spoiler of what they talk about because when you go to Seattle you have to do this tour. Disclaimer: it is not suitable for all ages - not because it's scary being underground, but because of the content. To give you an idea Seattle has the best case I've heard for being the origin city of the phrase "Skid Row." The tour was wonderfully colorful and I particularly enjoyed learning about what we on ships would call "deck prisms." If you are walking along a city street and see colorful stones in the sidewalk, those are likely crystal prisms that pour light below - it means, there's an underground passage beneath you. Most of which, you probably had no idea was even there. 

After the tour, we hopped back into the car and went to a surprise destination: 

The mother ship! 

Feel like I don't have to talk about this as you know what it is.

Alas, the adventure was over. My dear aunts drove me to SEA/TAC and with lots of hugs and kisses, I bid them fair winds for the time being. I knew I'd be seeing them again soon.

When I was in the airport, I ran into an old friend, which was a wonderful surprise. We visited and then we had to part ways as there was a plane with my name on it. My adventure to the north was wonderful. I feel very blessed to have done this weekend trip and who knows where the next adventure will take us...except...what's this??

Come back to see the adventures ahead on this, the weekly read!

Until next week!

Your humble author,

S. Faxon 

   

Seeing Seattle

In the midst of my production of the Golden Girls saga, I went out and about of my San Diego home northward bound to Seattle, Washington. My visit up north was brief, but PACKED with fun adventures and it's high time I share those adventures with you, dear readers.

 Last time I was in the North West corner was about twelve years ago (holy cow!), so I was quite excited to see Seattle once more. But I was especially excited to see my sweet aunts who live there!

Being a busy worker bee, I spent the first half of my Thursday at work before popping over to San Diego International Airport, also known as Lindbergh Field. (Side note; Charles Lindbergh's plane, the Spirit of Saint Louis was built in San Diego at Dutch Flats, an area of present day Point Loma, by Ryan Airliners. HENCE why the airport has two names,) My wait there was short and I was able to check my bag at the gate, which was a wonderful relief as I despise having to shove luggage over peoples' heads. I'm unusually paranoid that I'm going to drop my bag on someone's head. Talk about an ouch!

The flight was quick and painless. I ended up writing a fair amount of one of my books on my iPad during the voyage, so that was lovely. Felt like vacation right off the bat!

Sea-Tac was an interesting airport. I had to take a shuttle train from my terminal to the baggage claim before stumbling out into the cool and refreshing Washington air. My aunts were at the airport and ready to go! Even though there was heavy traffic leaving the airport, we were able to visit the entire way, so that made the ride go quickly by.

Mocha-Moch, my new furry friend

We enjoyed some yummy Thai food, but it took us just shy of an hour to get to their neck of the woods (literally) because of the traffic. We just laughed and visited the whole way up. My aunts are wonderfully adventurous spirits. They have been to England, Ireland, and Ecuador in the last few months alone! They just arrived that week from their latest international trip, but you would never know it from their energy! When we made it to their cute house, we fed the neighbor's chickens, (named Goldie, Opal, and Ethel), collected eggs, fed a different neighbor's cat, housed a stray kitty, who is quite friendly in the garage and turned on her heated senior citizen home, then fed their two cats and the 16 year old puppy, Sophie. They call it the coldesac farm. All the animals are very sweet and it was a lot of fun getting to help care for such a collection of furry and feathered friends.

We made plans to see the tulip fields and a few other amazing spots for the next day. 

Early the next morning, my aunt fed her "people". First, she starts with the crows and the squirrels, giving them a cup full of peanuts, which they gratefully received. After that, we fed Ms. Ellie Mae, the retired senior citizen kitty with her heated bed. She was never attracted to the idea of going inside, but she LOVED being pet. Then, we went to the chickens to let them out of their little hen house. We had to feed them in two separate piles - Opal likes to peck, I mean, pick on Goldie, so she and Ethel would eat from one pile of corn and Goldie could have her own.

The mostly golden girls

After all the furred and feathered friends were fed, we ate some yummy oats ourselves and then hopped in the car to go birding. We saw the most AMAZING things! We enjoyed the company of dozens of Russian trumpeter swans and Eagles! Real, wild, nesting BALD EAGLES!!! Now, my readers in the northern neck of the woods are probably thinking, "Meh, no big deal." But to a kid from the southern half of the states who has never seen a wild Eagle before, this was a wonderful and an incredible sight. The areas that we visited to see the birds were breathtaking even of themselves.

The only problem with birding in Washington in early March is that it is COLD! We were bundled up, but the wind coming off the water was a descent reminder that North West cold is waaaaaaaaay more piercing than South West cold.

We drove up a little ways more north and drove through the blooming tulip fields. It was spectacular. Yellow and orange, and gold flowers as far as the eyes could see!

The Russian swans were enjoying the flowers as well. If you're wondering what Russian swans were doing in Seattle, don't worry, they were here on visas...I'm just kidding. It's a part of their migration pattern to have their babies here then they eat as many potatoes as possible before making the incredible long trek back to Russia. Talk about a commute! Trumpeter Swans mate for life and travel in family units.

It was a lot of fun to hear the squawks and honks of the swans as we drove through the country roads, winding our way to the Mount Vernon area, where under the watchful gaze of a red-tulip painted tower, we had our lunch at the Calico Cafe. Oh my gosh. I will never be able to have better clam chowder than that which I enjoyed at this cafe. SO GOOD! We sipped delicious coffees and enjoyed our salads and soups. For dessert we enjoyed an excellent apple cinnamon bun.

We drove back down to our neck of the woods, watching the Canadian geese, the Russian Swans, and the tulip fields fly by. When we made it back to the house, we watched two Episodes of Discovery Channel's Dirty Jobs that talk about the Maritime Museum of San Diego's ships, the one-hundred-eleven year old steam-yacht Medea and the 152 year old iron hulled barq, Star of India. We did this in preparation for our next adventure, which I'll tell you all about next time in the Weekly Read!

Until then, Dear Readers!

Your humble author,
S. Faxon

It's Not Normal, But It's Ours

Family is one of the most complicated subjects that we are confronted with in life and one that has puzzled people, authors, philosophers throughout the ages. Shakespeare demonstrated the heavy struggles of family loyalty and duty in Romeo and Juliet. Leave It To Beaver demonstrated the squeaky-clean, "American" ideal image of family, one that has been stuck to our conscious as though applied with glue. 

We've been rather conditioned to think of the ideal family as a mom, dad, a couple of tots and perhaps a dog. I often think of the show Growing Pains where there was the working dad, the stay at home mom (for many years and yes eventually she went to work), two brothers and two sisters. Yes, the family was not without our typical every day issues, but there was a level of societal perfection to it that so many of us do not boast. And guess what: it's ok.

So what if your family does not have the a-typical 4 Bedroom, 2.5 bath house with (Mom + Dad = pre-determined amount of babies)...that feels way too much like an algebra problem and not real life. Real life is better shown in shows like today's Modern Family, but of course, THE best, the most real, the most raw was given to us by the Golden Girls. (If this comes as any surprise to you, you may want to go back a few posts and catch up.)

Each one of the girls have their own demonstrations that family is not what always the ideal Leave It To Beaver structure we've been taught to believe in; Blanche is nearly disowned from her family because of her pride when she refuses to go to her father's funeral; Rose has a sister who is wickedly manipulative to the point where she attempts to ostracize her from her friends; Sophia was not married to the most handsome, clever, or smart man in the village, but her late-husband  Sal loved her with all of his heart and that was all she needed; and then there's Dorothy's brother Phil. Oh, Phil. Where to begin? 

Let's start with Dorothy, or more formally, Dorothea Petrillo, daughter of immigrants Salvador and Sophia Petrillo, mother of Michael and Kate, sister of Phil, and former wife of Stanley Zbornak, "first class yutz." Her family demonstrates the a-typical American family, and no, not the televised American family, the REAL American family. Maybe not your own, but I can almost guarantee that among your friends, your relatives, neighbors or colleagues, there's more than a few like this one. Each member of Dorothy's family could compose an entire chapter on the ins-and-outs representing American life, Stan could be a book to himself, but we're going to focus on her little brother Phil and we'll start with his death.

At the beginning of the episode, we learn that the girls are preparing to go to Phil's funeral. The girls are obviously very sad, but we are almost instantly reminded of a hobby of Phil's that had been mentioned on numerous occasions about the character throughout the show, though we never actually get to meet Phil: he's a cross dresser and he happened to die of a heart attack while trying on evening gowns. 

Sophia comes out into the living room and in her mourning clothes, asks of the girls:

"Dorothy, I never understood why your brother liked to wear women's clothes, unless he was queer."

Blanche respectfully replies, "Sophia, people don't say queer any more, they say gay."

To which Sophia corrects, "They say gay if a guy can sing the entire score of GiGi. But a six-foot-three, two hundred pound married man with kids who likes to dress up like Dorothy Lamore I think you have to go with queer."

Phil is an extraordinarily unique character within the show. It's easy to assume that a man who wears women's clothes and watches Gladiator movies has a penchant to be gay, BUT, he wasn't. Blanche is the character who ends up having a gay brother, but Dorothy's brother is simply different and the whole conversation of Phil throughout the series sheds light on the fact that it's ok to be different and to have a family member who is different. Regardless if the members of our family are different or "normal", we love them anyway. This question though of why someone is different and how they came to their choices is difficult for some of us to accept. Sophia demonstrates the questioning of "what did I do wrong" a parent may feel if their child doesn't quite meet that ideal image that they create for their babe. Parents create this ideal image of what their baby's life should be and when their child's reality is different from their parents' dreams, that can be a difficult concept to accept. Some parents do and that is wonderful, but some resent the fact that their child's dreams are different from their own. We see this later point with Sophia. She goes DECADES without stepping foot in her son's home because she alleges to resent Phil's wife, Sally, when in reality she is resentful to the fact that her baby boy's hobby was drastically different from her ideal image and she fears that people blame her for Phil's being different. Dorothy goes to wits end trying to play peacebuilder to her mother and sister-in-law. Dorothy loved her brother unconditionally regardless of his differences - he was her brother and that was all that mattered.

Eventually, Rose becomes moderator between the clashing Titans, Phil's surviving wife and Sophia. Rose asks Sophia why she is so upset at Sally. To which Sophia replies, "The dress thing, why didn't she stop the dress thing?" 

Sally defends herself that Phil's cross dressing didn't start with her and Sophia immediately responds, "Oh, so it was my fault?"

Rose asks, "Are you worried that people will think it's your fault, Sophia?" In a backwards way, Sophia admits that yes, she was concerned by this. Rose establishes that Phil was a good provider, overall, a good human being. Rose then proceeds to go into a St. Olaf story, most of which I'll spare you from, but she ends with, "It was shame that kept Aunt Katrina from loving slow Ingmar and it ruined her life. So what if he was different? It's ok that you loved him."

Realizing her folly, Sophia says, "I did love him. He was my son. My little boy. But every time I saw him I always wondered what I did, what I said, when was the day that I did whatever I did to make him the way he was."

Sally stands and says, "What he was, Sophia, was a good man."

Falling a part, strong Sophia cries, "My baby is gone."

It's an extremely intense scene; a mother realizing that she didn't show her boy all of her love because she was ashamed and scared that she would be judged for his decisions. In an earlier scene, Dorothy gives the eulogy at her brother's funeral and the dialogue is worth reading because it demonstrates the importance the absolute importance of loving and appreciating every moment we have with our loved ones because we don't know when they will be taken away: 

"Seems like I'm always mad at my brother Phil. I was mad the day my parents brought him back from the hospital; I thought he'd take their love away from me, and instead their love expanded and we felt ore like a family. I was mad at him when I was ten and he was four and we moved to a new neighborhood; I was mad because he always made new friends more easily than I did. And I'm mad today because I never wanted to give the eulogy at my kid brother's funeral. I'm mad because he died he didn't have the wisdom to know that family members shouldn't allow themselves to grow apart because when this day comes they can no longer tell each other how they care. If he had that wisdom he could have shared that with me and I would have of just the two of us eating ice cream on the stoop of our building, going through the drawers of grandma's house, or dressing up like the Bronte sisters. How those memories fill me with joy. Why didn't you have that wisdom fill, why didn't you give us a chance to tell you how much we loved you?"

Love takes so little effort and yet it seems that we are so much quicker to hate. It doesn't make sense. Don't let society, stereotypes, misguided ignorance or assumptions determine the love that you share. If your child is happy, loving, gracious, humble and successful, is that not something to be proud of? If their dreams are different than yours, have you not created a strong, independent individual? If your sibling's life is different from your own, hey, at least you won't have to compete over the same victories, however large or small. 

Family is crazy, family can be a mess. It can be stability. It can be our biggest frustration. It can be our peace. Regardless of what you find it to be, it's likely not "normal," it's not what we grew up believing in it to be, but it's ours and it's something to hold and to treasure, especially if it's not perfect. It's helped to influence who you are today.

Now, I am trying to keep these posts to analyzing sitcoms or plays alongside Golden Girls. However, I think Disney's Tarzan is one of THE most touching and beautiful examples of the "it's not normal, but it is ours" family structures I've yet seen produced. Likewise, my workplace has this odd family connection, where we are dysfunctional, mostly crazy, and we are certainly not without our inner conflict, but at the end of the day, we are all under the same colors and we do for each other, as we do for our own blood. Golden Girls show us that blood is not the only definition of what makes "family." That the bonds of love, friendship, loyalty, pride, and faith are what truly make us and keep us as kin. 

Until next time, Dear Readers,

Your humble author,

S. Faxon