And on to Providence! (If the spacing is a little funny when you read the following, I apologize - I couldn't figure out how to reformat the text.)
Chapter
14: Being Mrs. Higley
As dark and as dreary as winter could turn, nothing was more daunting to Ms. Grace than becoming Mrs. Brian Higley. The days until the first of the year melted far too quickly and
yet somehow they dragged along. Ms. Grace wanted to get the ceremony over with and yet she wanted to enjoy her last few days of not being a slave for as long as possible.
yet somehow they dragged along. Ms. Grace wanted to get the ceremony over with and yet she wanted to enjoy her last few days of not being a slave for as long as possible.
In the isolation of her bedroom there was little for Ms. Grace to do but dread the future and remember the sweet little things from the past. Not being in her classroom over the last three weeks was driving her mad with boredom. She spent most of her days in solitude lying on her bed unable to rest. The torturous misery of being denied the opportunity to be with the man that she loved was enhanced by the silence of her schoolhouse.
The boredom was expected and it had been the least of her worries once the school was forced to close. It had been imminent the moment the fight of the Thomas’ and the Davis’ scared all of the festival attendees home. It was a second year of loss for the poor people of Providence. But all did not end well for the perpetrators that caused the foreclosure of the festival. The Davis’ and the Thomas’ were severely punished. The families had to pay for all that was damaged and lost, but far more pressingly, both families lost a child; the young Mr. Davis and Miss Thomas made it to the safety of Viramont with the secret help of the reverend’s cousins. Their aid with the mortals had been approved by the clan with much deliberation and voting, so with a small grant from the Cärabadés, the children were far away from the hate and pain of their families. The children were happy, a little scared with the uncertainty of the future, but genuinely happy. Their
families on the other hand had to go on day by day with the knowledge that they would potentially never see their children or their grandchild. Yes, the girl conceived, for such is life.
families on the other hand had to go on day by day with the knowledge that they would potentially never see their children or their grandchild. Yes, the girl conceived, for such is life.
The Davis’ and the Thomas’ were not the only members of town who felt some form of grief as fall carried out its course. The weeks following the Fall Festival were very grey for Providence. All its members learned that day that life is not always easy, but none so much as Ms. Grace. Ms. Grace’s sadness only began on the first day of the festival, when for once everything was looking bright. She attended her dear friend J.J.’s wedding on that beautiful October Friday, which was lovely, yet much more quiet than originally planned. Ms. Grace did her absolute best to smile and laugh with and for her dear friend who simply glowed with happiness. In her heart, Ms. Grace deeply envied the new Mrs. Vega, for she was able to marry a man she loved.
Ms. Grace felt sick throughout the wedding ceremony following the disastrous opening day of the Fall Festival. Thursday had been chaotic – there had been no time to talk to anyone as everyone was either injured or helping to clear the town of its broken windows, smashed patios, and ruined carts. School was canceled and Ms. Grace spent much of that afternoon hiding in her home. She knew that she would have to tell the man that she loved that Mr. Higley already asked for her hand. The very thought made her ill – she did not want to tell Mr. Tamrin, but nor did she want him to be told by someone else. No, the words would have to come from her. Ms. Grace did not know what she would say. However, she did know that she did not want Mr. Tamrin to be the presiding reverend at the event. She could not do that to him or to herself.
As she sat in the church watching her friend say her vows, Ms. Grace could not help to cry more for her own sorrow than for her friend. This only made her cry more because she felt selfish. Throughout the ceremony Ms. Grace clutched tightly to her father’s silver pocket watch. It was the only thing that could keep her from completely falling apart. She felt so small being such a wreck while the reverend looked absolutely dashing and so very happy.
The reverend was on a polar spectrum from Ms. Grace. The wedding between Ms. Joyce and Mr. Vega was all he had been looking forward to all week. He was of course excited for the new
couple, but he was primarily anticipating the ceremony he had planned for after the wedding. The catastrophe on Wednesday only further embellished his anticipation for this night. Mr. Tamrin knew that it was wrong of him to do so, but in the back of his head all morning prior to the event he imagined that it was for his own wedding that he was preparing. He could only hope that the ring he chose would fit his girl right.
couple, but he was primarily anticipating the ceremony he had planned for after the wedding. The catastrophe on Wednesday only further embellished his anticipation for this night. Mr. Tamrin knew that it was wrong of him to do so, but in the back of his head all morning prior to the event he imagined that it was for his own wedding that he was preparing. He could only hope that the ring he chose would fit his girl right.
The reverend was beaming as he read the rite of marriage to Ms. Joyce and Mr. Vega. He could see Ms. Grace’s tear filled eyes in the pews behind her friend’s family and he assumed her to be emotional at weddings. He never would have guessed her emotion to have been one of sadness.
The small party after the wedding was hosted in J.J.’s family’s home. No one was quite sure how the Joyce’s allowed it in their house, but Mr. Callaghan managed to sneak many a spirits inside. He figured that the people here could use an evening of boisterous conversation after this past week. There was much laughter and many smiling faces after only an hour of being in the Joyces’ home. It was a good party. Mostly everyone was happy and having a splendid time talking it up with good friends and chatty neighbors.
But Ms. Grace did her best to avoid practically everyone in the house. She was glad Hewie’s husband brought liquor, so that her friends would be so distracted that they would not notice her tepid behavior. She did especially well in avoiding Mr. Tamrin. She did not want this imminent talk to come a moment too soon.
The reverend did his best to find Ms. Grace, but she kept slipping away. He could hardly wait a moment longer.
Ms. Grace was quiet.
Mr. Tamrin was laughing and having an excellent time.
Ms. Grace did not drink. She did not want the influence to say the wrong things and she felt sick enough already.
The reverend’s face was a little pinker than usual; he needed the extra boost for his nerves.
The heat inside the house became too much. Ms. Grace stepped outside. The October night air was cool, but it did little in the means of reprieve or relief. Her heart was pounding as she stood in the dark. Like her own home, the Joyce’s backyard was the large field south of Providence. It was a nice, quiet place where one could easily become lost in reverie. In the warmer months, it was not a rare thing to see in this twilight hour a maverick cow making her attempt to find freedom across that meadow from either of the mad dairy families. However, Ms. Grace was not fortunate enough for such entertainment. The cows were not so much as mooing tonight. Her only company that she could see was a deer grazing on the far side of the meadow by the line of trees.
Yet even the deer was enveloped in the settling blanket of darkness, so Ms. Grace’s eyes made way to look at the heavens. The dark violet sky was patched with thick scattered clouds. Their presence alone threatened these lands with the rains everyone knew were soon to come. Fall was always very wet, which almost overnight would switch to the beginning of the snow season. Ms. Grace thought of the cold to come as her eyes danced with the twinkling stars, but they were all blurry. She did her best to distract herself with anything that came to mind. As pathetic as it sounds, she even wished that there was a cow out there wandering so she could at least help the poor heifer to make her break. Again, anything to distract her from thinking about becoming Mrs. Higley.
The hum from the party in the house was no longer inviting. Ms. Grace wanted to be alone. She began to consider leaving without delivering the message, but as her weakening knees started
to bend to leave, the back porch door opened. At first Ms. Grace assumed that it was probably the happy couple sneaking out the back so that they scurry away to get some sort of privacy, but alas she was wrong.
to bend to leave, the back porch door opened. At first Ms. Grace assumed that it was probably the happy couple sneaking out the back so that they scurry away to get some sort of privacy, but alas she was wrong.
The reverend emerged. He knew he would find her. The gentleman’s face erupted in a smile, for at last he had found his lady and conveniently enough they would be alone – he would not be so embarrassed this way.
“Good evening, Ms. Grace,” he cheerfully greeted as he slowly came to her side.
The teacher sniffled heavily and quickly dried her eyes – she did not realize that she was crying
until the reverend came outside.
until the reverend came outside.
The reverend, even with more than a stein in his stomach was only slightly pinker faced than normal. His perception and awareness were at ninety percent; he did not miss the way Ms.
Grace attempted to hide her tears and at first he thought her sadness to be something easily cured. Mr. Tamrin approached Ms. Grace’s side. With his hands in his pockets he held his head almost cockily to the side. He looked so handsome to Ms. Grace. “It’s a beautiful night,” he started while his hands shook a little from nerves. “I am glad that at least one element of this week went smoothly.”
Grace attempted to hide her tears and at first he thought her sadness to be something easily cured. Mr. Tamrin approached Ms. Grace’s side. With his hands in his pockets he held his head almost cockily to the side. He looked so handsome to Ms. Grace. “It’s a beautiful night,” he started while his hands shook a little from nerves. “I am glad that at least one element of this week went smoothly.”
Ms. Grace chuckled, “Yes, our plan to give Miss Thomas and Mr. Davis peaceful welcomes certainly leapt out of hand.” She snuffled again then said, “At least they are safe, yes?”
The reverend nodded. Crossing his arms, he leaned his side against the wall Ms. Grace’s back was against. “Yes, Howard and Lin were able to get them to Viramont alright. They will be able to lead normal lives now.”
The gentle songs of the crickets chirping in the distance filled the brief silence between the mortals.
Ms. Grace sighed. “Mr. Tamrin,” she started, she figured now or never. Awkward silence was something she could not stand even though this was going to be the hardest thing she had ever done. “There’s something, um, something I need to discuss with you.”
“You know that you can speak with me about anything, Ms. Grace.” The reverend swallowed hard and decided to be bold like he was the other day in the classroom. He gently reached to Ms. Grace’s face and pushed behind her ear that one lock of her hair that always seemed to escape.
Ms. Grace trembled from the touch. She loved it when he touched her (although mostly every time before was accidental or entirely innocent).
Ms. Grace trembled from the touch. She loved it when he touched her (although mostly every time before was accidental or entirely innocent).
“Reverend,” she called. Her voice was quivering and thick with sorrow. “I’ll ask that you refrain from, um, from interrupting or anything like that, even though I don’t want to hear it myself.” The entire composure of Ms. Grace was so strange to Mr. Tamrin. She would not look at him. She kept her eyes on the horizon and she seemed to be subconsciously attempting to become a part of the paneled wall.
“Is everything alright, Ms. Grace?” the reverend asked, instantly sobered by her seriousness.
Ms. Grace wanted to scream “no,” fall into the reverend’s arms and then run away with him in the night, but her rational mind interfered. Swallowing hard, she dictated the most difficult words she had ever strung together: “Mr. Tamrin, sweet man, I know that these past weeks with you have been the best of my life and I will treasure them forever. I am so grateful to God that I was able to teach by your side.” Her voice cracked as she looked to him. He already looked so lost from confusion and concern. “We make such a good team.” She smiled meekly. “And after our moment alone together in the classroom…I’ll bet anything I’ve ever thought dear to me that we would have made the best partners in life. But, I have recently learned that my school will soon be forced to close due to budget restrictions. It is a resolute decision of the mayor’s. If everything that I have planned figures correctly, my school will be able to stay open until December. If I close the adult class and focus materials on the children that should be able to happen. The children need the schooling more. So, I am very sorry to say, Mr. Tamrin, but we will no longer be able to, er, to instruct together.” She figured as well that this would be the best foundation for separation between them, so the reminder of their superior partnership would not be so strong.
The reverend’s heart beat a little more lightly. He assumed that this surely was the end of the conflict riddling Ms. Grace. He smiled gently and said softly, “I am sure the adults will understand, but is there any way that we could do a fundraiser to get the schoolhouse back up on its feet? I can hardly imagine Providence without an active student population. Huh, just think of all the trouble the youngin’s ‘ill get themselves into with all that time on their hands.” He ended with an incredibly charming wink.
Ms. Grace bit her lower lip and she shook her head. She could not gather herself to answer or to elaborate at the moment.
Seeing her queer reaction, the reverend then began to think that maybe Ms. Grace was so emotional tonight because she was afraid that her school would never open again. The reverend took a step closer to Ms. Grace. He had the intent to place an assuring hand on her shoulder, but she did something that made him second guess his action; she took a step away.
“Ms. Grace?” he asked, feeling mildly hurt.
The school teacher buried her face in her hands. She was too deep to turn back.
The reverend was becoming unnerved. He was running through every memory to attempt to guess where something went wrong.
“Mr. Tamrin,” she again commenced. The night air had now thoroughly chilled her bones. “I want you to know that what I am about to tell you has nothing to do with anything you have done. You are in no way responsible for anything that comes with my decision. You are a,” Ms. Grace had to stop, she could hardly speak. “You are a wonderful man and I hate myself for my decision, but for the greater good.” She could not look at him. “Mrs. Higley has promised to fund the schoolhouse next year if and only if I…if I marry her son. If I do not, the mayor, her bloody brother, will continue to drive funding away from the school and Providence’s children will not be allowed to learn. I can’t let that happen to them. I can’t let go of teaching, it’s a part of me.”
The reverend could not believe what he was hearing. The one soul he had ever fallen for was being blackmailed into marrying another. He leaned more heavily on the wall. “Is there, is there any way we could fight this?” he asked, “This has to be illegal.”
“I am sure that it is, but who would listen to our complaints? The county magistrate?” Ms. Grace asked knowing the answer already. “The magistrate is married to the other sibling of the mayor and Mrs. Higley! There is no one we could…there’s nothing that can be done.”
“You’re not going to marry that pig of a man for money, are you, Ms. Grace?” it was the first time in his life that the reverend had ever spoken blatantly ill of another soul.
“What other choice do I have, Mr. Tamrin?” she shouted. “What else can I do? I did not come to this decision lightly, you know. Mr. Higley is the last man on earth that I want to spend my life bound to as wife, but I didn’t have a choice. Being Mrs. Higley is not something that I have ever
“What other choice do I have, Mr. Tamrin?” she shouted. “What else can I do? I did not come to this decision lightly, you know. Mr. Higley is the last man on earth that I want to spend my life bound to as wife, but I didn’t have a choice. Being Mrs. Higley is not something that I have ever
wanted even though it is a fate the whole bloody town has expected of me. You of all people should know how much I hate to prove their gossip right.”
The reverend was speechless. He ran his hand over his face and in a wave of his disordered
thoughts he could not even keep his focus straight. How could this be happening? Why was this happening? How could so pure a soul be bound to the scum of their town? And then it hit him – he would have to perform the ceremony.
thoughts he could not even keep his focus straight. How could this be happening? Why was this happening? How could so pure a soul be bound to the scum of their town? And then it hit him – he would have to perform the ceremony.
In their silence Ms. Grace managed to feel even worse for yelling at Mr. Tamrin. “Forgive me for shouting, Mr. Tamrin,” Ms. Grace apologized. “You have done nothing wrong.”
But before she could continue to say what she had planned, Mr. Tamrin was able to pull himself
together: “Ms. Grace, think what you will of me, but as your…as your friend and as your reverend I will not consent to perform your marriage to that man!” This was the first time in his life that the reverend ever felt true anger toward another man’s soul. He felt that if Mr. Higley were to come across his path that perhaps too his first physical outburst would escape. “I know that what I am about to tell you may be of little significance, but hear me through: I am an aritoire, Ms. Grace. That means that my instincts and my awareness of the world around me are more honed and intense than the average person. With this gift I am also more keen to human character and I’ve almost a sixth sense about these things, Ms. Grace, so I beg of you to listen to me: I can detect no good from any involvement between you and Mr. Higley! There is something about that man that does not seem right.” The reverend took a step away from Ms. Grace and he again ran his hand over his face. His cheeks felt so warm. He was not wholly sure if it was his instinct as an aritoire or if it was his own personal feelings for Ms. Grace dictating his speech, but as long as it sounded convincing maybe she would take his words to heart. Mr. Tamrin turned back to his company, but the dark hid her expression, which was deeply hurt. She already knew that no good would come of this union.
“Please, Ms. Grace,” the reverend pleaded. “I beg of you, reconsider. Don’t give up your life when there’s someone right in front of you who will love and cherish you until the end.”
together: “Ms. Grace, think what you will of me, but as your…as your friend and as your reverend I will not consent to perform your marriage to that man!” This was the first time in his life that the reverend ever felt true anger toward another man’s soul. He felt that if Mr. Higley were to come across his path that perhaps too his first physical outburst would escape. “I know that what I am about to tell you may be of little significance, but hear me through: I am an aritoire, Ms. Grace. That means that my instincts and my awareness of the world around me are more honed and intense than the average person. With this gift I am also more keen to human character and I’ve almost a sixth sense about these things, Ms. Grace, so I beg of you to listen to me: I can detect no good from any involvement between you and Mr. Higley! There is something about that man that does not seem right.” The reverend took a step away from Ms. Grace and he again ran his hand over his face. His cheeks felt so warm. He was not wholly sure if it was his instinct as an aritoire or if it was his own personal feelings for Ms. Grace dictating his speech, but as long as it sounded convincing maybe she would take his words to heart. Mr. Tamrin turned back to his company, but the dark hid her expression, which was deeply hurt. She already knew that no good would come of this union.
“Please, Ms. Grace,” the reverend pleaded. “I beg of you, reconsider. Don’t give up your life when there’s someone right in front of you who will love and cherish you until the end.”
Ms. Grace snuffled hard. “I would never ask you to marry me to another man, Mr. Tamrin,” she softly assured. Her jaw quivered, but she had to finish what she needed to say. She could not run now. Ms. Grace pulled from her pocket the silver watch of her father’s. She held it between herself and Mr. Tamrin. “I am not so cruel, Mr. Tamrin. I will probably do a private ceremony
in Dansend or in Sets to spare you. I care for you so much.” She sobbed then continued. “I understand that you are, that you are speaking from your heart, sir, for my protection, but this is
something that I have to do, that I must do.” She looked into Mr. Tamrin’s eyes for the first time during this conversation. From their weakness her eyes tended to play tricks on her, but they
were standing close enough now that she was able to see the uselessness he felt for the situation. She only hoped that he saw the love she had for him through her own expression. Ms. Grace swallowed hard and hiccupped from her tears as she said, “D’ you see this pocket watch? It is all that I have of my parents’ belongings. It is a very large piece of my heart, a large piece of me.” She held it closer to Mr. Tamrin. “I want you to have it.” Mr. Tamrin shook his head, for he could not so easily take something like that from her. He had yet to discern her true meaning. “No, please, Mr. Tamrin, take it,” she persisted. “It is my heart. Take this so that you will know that it is yours. So it will always belong to you…even if I cannot.”
in Dansend or in Sets to spare you. I care for you so much.” She sobbed then continued. “I understand that you are, that you are speaking from your heart, sir, for my protection, but this is
something that I have to do, that I must do.” She looked into Mr. Tamrin’s eyes for the first time during this conversation. From their weakness her eyes tended to play tricks on her, but they
were standing close enough now that she was able to see the uselessness he felt for the situation. She only hoped that he saw the love she had for him through her own expression. Ms. Grace swallowed hard and hiccupped from her tears as she said, “D’ you see this pocket watch? It is all that I have of my parents’ belongings. It is a very large piece of my heart, a large piece of me.” She held it closer to Mr. Tamrin. “I want you to have it.” Mr. Tamrin shook his head, for he could not so easily take something like that from her. He had yet to discern her true meaning. “No, please, Mr. Tamrin, take it,” she persisted. “It is my heart. Take this so that you will know that it is yours. So it will always belong to you…even if I cannot.”
Mr. Tamrin looked sharply from the pocket watch to Ms. Grace. Now he understood. The silver chain and clock in her clutch slipped into Mr. Tamrin’s hands. He held it delicately, as one would a new born. This was just as precious.
Ms. Grace smiled humbly. She snuffled again then said, “And now you know.” With one last look at the man she knew she would love for all eternity, the school teacher turned away. With her arms crossed over her chest, she quickly disappeared into the darkness of the field.
The reverend did not see her sprint home with all her might. Nor did he see collapse onto her bed to weep into the pillows throughout the night. For a long while he simply sat with his back planted against the Joyce’s house. The cold, moist ground did not affect him. He was too busy holding the golden band he meant to give to Ms. Grace in one palm while his other hand held her heart. He watched with tear filled eyes the seconds, the minutes, the hours tick away into nothing, the time he had so recently assumed he would have and should have spent with her.
~*~*~
Tune in next week for Part 3 of The Tale of the Tamrins!
Your humble author,
S. Faxon
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